Do you realize that when he went to you, you lost him forever? If I could ever “perfectly take revenge” on you for all the filth you brought into my home, it was only by sending him to you. Because the more my image fades from his memory, the more he will long for me. People are built this way: they desire the fruit of their imagination more than a real person.
Have you ever met a man who dreams of pressing his wife against the elevator wall and pulling her panties off? Only maybe during the honeymoon phase. A worn-out wife is feared, disrespected, and sometimes even hated. That is your fate. Now YOU will be his wife.
The flowers, compliments, manicures, gifts, and café dates are over. Freedom. To the wife: grocery shopping, chronic lack of money, cooking, laundry, cleaning, complaints, a sniffling child, and a demanding mother-in-law.
Another man cannot love those who are close to him; he can only love those who are distant and unattainable. Had he stayed with me, he would have always believed he let the bird of happiness fly away. That would have ultimately ruined our relationship—but since he left… with his last breath, he will utter MY name.
I don’t think you screamed with joy when he finally came to you. It didn’t happen at the moment you dreamed about it most. But deep inside, you triumphed, convinced that his love for you had finally overcome his fears and loyalty to his family?
But no one knows the whole truth. Just as I can only mentally reconstruct his coming to you, you don’t know how he avoided me. And who was truly the initiator—he probably won’t tell you.
A man can push his wife into divorce by provoking her with his awful behavior, but to leave a family… on his own initiative… Most often, the decision is made for him by two women on opposite sides: the mistress “pressuring him with her belly,” and the wife…
I married a dreamer who sang, painted, wrote poetry, spoke of the universe, and promised me the whole world. And who did I end up with? A man who lied to me and, ultimately, cowardly retreated when I felt unbearably bad and more afraid than ever. And all of this, mind you, not without your help.
Men are spoiled by available and careless women who enter relationships knowing full well his family exists. You were in the house, saw the children and the family bed… And you didn’t hesitate? Love??
And this is no love at all! Come on, you didn’t naively believe that, after drinking too much at a corporate party and seeking a dose of adrenaline for your backside, he unzipped his pants thinking: “Here it is, the chance to hurt my wife and simultaneously crush everything good between us?!” No! He didn’t want to hurt me at all. He simply forgot about me for a while.
Later, he told you he had long been breathing different air from his wife and sleeping in separate beds. And you believed him because you wanted to believe. I suspect he told you things about me, because I heard he spoke about you, trying to justify himself. I won’t repeat it. Though that could have been my revenge too, but it would be too cruel even for you.
As the saying goes, “a deceived wife finds out last.” True! It never even crossed my mind that his tenderness toward me came from guilt, his obedience and quietness from fear of being caught.
You can sense that something is wrong, but you never fully realize your world is about to collapse. I gently hug him at the door and bless him before he leaves the house. He still calls me “sweetheart” and calls me from work. But once, by accident, I overheard his phone call, and he called someone else “sweetheart”…
Now I know you had been “communicating” for a long time. You learned something about him. But believe me, only now will you truly get to know him. Since I know him better than anyone, I’ll say one thing: he is, of course, a likable personality… when he’s trying to charm someone. But since “the beloved mistress has almost become the wife,” there’s no longer any point in charming her…
“People shouldn’t divorce. Later, no one needs them with their migraines, sciatica, and bad habits. I got used to my husband snoring, but the new wife kicks him out of the bedroom. He comes to me—complaining. Pointless. And what really changed in his life? Only the address…” (Iren Rozdobudko)
And even if you live with him decently until old age, there’s no guarantee that one day you won’t accidentally overhear him sentimentally sniffling over a beer with his buddy in the kitchen: “I would never have left my family on my own, and I still love only her.” Drunken sentimental babbling…
And a hot wave will rise from your gut to your head, and in an instant you’ll forget all the good from those years. But you’ll have shared blood, a child not yet grown strong, and you won’t cast her out, nor will you leave yourself (where to?!), and only anger and rejection of him, such a traitor, will remain. But in truth, he became a “traitor” long ago—and not without your help.
“…So there’s no sense crying without reason. No one knows until what year our ticket is booked. Rejoice, pray that life passes us by without great sorrows.” (“You Could Have Been First,” Oleg Mityaev)
But today, perhaps, he still calls you “sweetheart” or “bunny”… And your heart trembles when…
“…he buries his nose in your neck, sighs deeply, and says you smell tastier than freshly made popcorn, warm apple pie, or slightly browned potato casserole… he says he laughed at your silly jokes because nothing better happened all evening… because nothing better happened all evening… you enchanted everyone with your naturalness…” (“Heart Flutter,” Ildiko von Kürty)
Oh! If a man, calling you his little doll, carries you in his arms, and you feel you can close your eyes and relax because you trust him completely… then perhaps it’s worth fighting for him, because he’s a rare specimen… and there’s something to later get hit on the head for from fate!
“…In our lives, everything is interconnected; each person makes their own choices. And as the physics textbook says, the angle of incidence equals the angle of reflection…” (“Physics,” Viktor Tretyakov)
But is he really that good? And can you truly relax? If you led a man away from his family, who can guarantee that someone even younger won’t take him from you? Should we even discuss his deep integrity and loyalty?!
Is it unpleasant and painful for you to read my bitter monologue? What did you expect? I met a pimply boy masturbating over a magazine cover. I gave him my young body for experiments. I added a piece to him, instilled confidence. I freed him from his father’s nagging and his mother’s endless moralizing.
For many years, he had everything: a reliable rear, work, children—the continuation of the lineage, a marital bed where you only had to stretch out your hand to touch a warm, living female body. I was there for him: housekeeper, laundress, nanny, governess, housekeeper, economist, dishwasher, cook, waitress, psychotherapist and just therapist, seamstress, stylist, hairdresser, mother, and lover (don’t fool yourself thinking I was completely inadequate in that department).
And him: he didn’t build a summer house, didn’t look for extra work, didn’t get into fishing or hunting… His house needed repairs, his children needed attention, his wife needed tenderness. And he grew bored—and… you grew bored…
Tell my ex that you will take revenge on him for me! I was too long and too good a wife. The younger generation isn’t as patient and self-sacrificing. I can already picture this honest scene: him at the sink, washing his own socks and underwear… himself!
PS Men have always cheated on their wives and left for younger women. They have left and they will continue to leave. And there will be hurt and tears. But it’s important that our pain be justified by your genuine feelings. And, if you manage to become for him that one missing half which people sometimes spend their entire lives searching for, and you grow old together, holding hands and tenderly gazing into each other’s eyes on a winter evening, wrapped in one blanket, listening to music … I will take back my words.
And I will say there was no crime at all.
