They say the main thing is not the gift, but the attention. And indeed, it’s indispensable—especially upon closer inspection of gifts. They are precisely what can reveal many interesting things about the person who gave them.
To form a fuller impression of a man’s personality, especially if you’re not married or living together, pay attention to the gift he gives of his own initiative, without any “prior hints” from you.
Standard Set
Candy and chocolate do not at all suggest that he thinks you’re too thin. More likely, they were bought in advance for a holiday—it’s just a routine, “default” gift. It indicates that the man either had no time to think of something original or simply didn’t want to bother.
Toys—your partner either wants to try on the role of a beloved daddy (such a man might suit a woman with a typical “childlike” behavioral pattern), or he’s conventional and under the influence of stereotypes. Or perhaps he simply doesn’t take you seriously. All of the above holds true unless you collect dolls and he knows about it. In that case, the gift signals that you truly matter to him.
Jewelry—if a man cheerfully hands you cheap costume jewelry from a kiosk in a subway passage, think carefully about what else he might skimp on if you ever get married. If you receive an expensive piece, he desires closeness. Accepting such a gift confirms that you’re ready to move to the next stage of the relationship. Don’t worry if the gift contradicts your beliefs. With 99% certainty, it can be said that few men realize that giving pearls brings tears, or that amethyst is a widow’s stone.
Perfumes and cosmetics—a banal supermarket set consisting of two lonely little bottles is a red flag. There are two possibilities: either he chose it himself, or someone helped him. In the first case, consider whether you really want someone prone to formal, impersonal solutions? The hidden message here sounds roughly like: “You wanted a gift—here it is!” In the second case, reflect on how much influence his mother still has over him. Either way, the result is uninspiring. Give the man full marks for thoughtfulness and attentiveness only if he gives you a matching fragrance to one you gave him on February 14th or 23rd, or a bottle of your favorite perfume.
Practical household items are given by practical men guided by common sense. Don’t expect fiery passion from him, but in difficult times, he won’t refuse to help. Is it high-end built-in appliances? Your admirer has serious intentions, possibly marriage. Be cautious if he gives you a clearly masculine tool—after all, you could just as well have given him a women’s fur coat. Such gifts “scream” of selfishness.
Computer accessories, especially when accompanied by the suitor’s offer to immediately help with installation, setup, and training, are a great sign. He desires closer contact. If you’re already close, consider it a caring gesture and his wish to show himself in the best light.
A mobile phone of the latest model, studded with rhinestones and/or featuring a design, indicates he sees you as fashionable, but a bit flighty. A “smartphone” packed with numerous additional functions suggests that, in his eyes, one of your main assets is intellect.
A fitness club membership—no, it’s not a compliment. No, it’s not an insult. View it as concern for your healthy lifestyle and/or a desire to spend as much time together as possible, especially if he also attends that club.
A gift certificate will come from an admirer who doesn’t wish to take initiative. Don’t expect dazzling courtship, but you’ll also avoid unpleasant surprises. This person will listen to your opinion.
Suspicious figurines and other vague souvenirs—before drawing conclusions, ask your suitor why he chose exactly this item; perhaps the gift has a hidden meaning? No explanation? Then beware! This person either has such inflated self-esteem that he believes anything he gives should be received by you as a great honor, or you’ve met a spineless or greedy individual.
Flowers—A Special Note
A single flower is given by an aesthete who dislikes excessive detail, an artist at heart (or someone who simply wants to please you, despite current financial constraints).
A bouquet of flowers—a master at making impressions, a lover who wants everything at once, in bulk; patience is unlikely to be among his virtues.
Standard flowers in cellophane—a practical person who, deep down, feels it’s a waste of money on packaging (since it’ll be thrown away anyway).
Bright red roses suggest the romance will be passionate, but short-lived.
It’s believed that a man who gives calla lilies is immediately ready for marriage. Unfortunately, among the editor’s acquaintances surveyed, no one could confirm or refute this statement.
Pickup-Style Gifts
It’s pleasant when a man gives unusual gifts, even more so when you know he does it sincerely and with pure intentions. Unfortunately, if in the list above you recognize more than three gifts from a new admirer, there’s a chance you’ve met a pickup artist—a man who collects women and reads “The Rules of Seduction” at night. Pickup artists firmly believe that a gift is a shortcut into a woman’s heart, and it can be used for any purpose—even to obtain “one-time” sex.
List of “Suspicious Gifts”
A mug with his (or your joint) photo, a potted flower, large underwear painted by him personally, erotic lingerie, helium balloons with a hidden gift inside one of them, a gas mask, a construction helmet, a piece of the Moon’s surface, a prepaid subscription to your favorite magazine.
Leading the top three are the tear-off calendar with pleasant messages on each page. Read them carefully for “coded” phrases like “Your ankles are beautiful,” “You cook delicious dumplings,” “When you sneeze, you look like a kitten. And, by the way, you don’t spray at all,” and the box of kisses labeled “Box of Air” with the note on the back: “I love you.”
