Fortunately, perhaps all the zodiac signs are similar, but they definitely suffer in different ways.
Aries A proud Aries suffers in silence. It’s not due to being closed-off or fearing public judgment. These guys simply don’t know fear. It’s just that they clearly understand that a) you wouldn’t be able to help anyone anyway, so why strain your vocal cords? b) you couldn’t possibly understand what’s going on inside an Aries’ soul—you’re not an Aries. And if you’re not, then your personal experience (don’t get upset, just accept it as it is) is, by default, crap. So he’ll figure it out himself, get through it, and has survived far worse.
Taurus This is the destructive martyr. Depressed shoulder shrugs and soaking pillows with tears, quiet sniffling into the wall—somehow it’s unsportsmanlike and therefore pointless. If Taurus is suffering, his surroundings won’t miss it, even if they really wanted to. The sign’s hallmark is a characteristic nuclear mushroom cloud rising simultaneously from all sides of the horizon. And with a sorrowful question: “What have I done to deserve all this?”, Taurus sweeps the debris of Torzhok (the city of sufferers) into a distant corner with a broom.
Gemini The verbose martyrs. If you carelessly ask, “What happened?”, be ready to learn about Gemini’s affairs roughly a thousand times more than you intended. He’ll start from a distant year in the last century, when a warm evening still reigned outside the window, when the bushes outside were unaware that a harsh winter with an icy scythe was already peeking around the corner, laughing at the flora’s carefreeness. And he’ll end by saying that he, the little naive Gemini, years ago laughed heartily at the jokes of the greatest love of his life… Don’t ask, “What happened?” He’ll tell you everything anyway, but in that case, there’s at least a chance he’ll begin his wild story from the current millennium.
Cancer The highly spiritual martyrs. Why jump straight to “drowning their sorrows”? Not necessarily. No, he’ll theatrically roll his eyes, sigh deeply, listen to beautiful music, and study self-improvement books. More advanced Cancers will start writing self-improvement books themselves. Younger Cancers will take up the pen and write lines like: “Blood, death, pain. Night, shadow, darkness. You left, but your heart remains with me. Sob or croak, something like that.”
Leo The sociable martyrs. To suffer alone, in Leo’s opinion, is a waste of time and emotional resources. Everyone should suffer. Thus, all his suffering will involve every slow-moving vassal who didn’t manage to tear their claws away in time and flee to Kenya. Interestingly, without even noticing it, the vassals—without fully engaging in what’s happening—will add Leo’s offenders to their personal enemy list. And they’ll rush into battle. Leo, in turn, will advise them to add some spice and won’t forget to thank them for being there.
Virgo The constructive sufferer. She suffers while wallpapering and defending her diploma. That’s why she’s the object of general envy. Like, she’s so strong, holds up so beautifully—something others couldn’t manage. Overall, kudos. Actually, Virgo doesn’t even try to deny such an assessment, yet deep inside, she’s infinitely grateful for her suffering. She sees it as a magical kick that arrived just in time—a true miracle worker.
Libra The balanced sufferers, who try to place something pleasant on the other scale. What exactly serves as a counterweight depends on Libra’s status, wallet thickness, and gender: someone might be inspired by a new floor-cleaning rag, while another might take a round-the-world trip on their private yacht. Thus, from the outside, they appear to be the most carefree zodiac sign. You just don’t see what it costs them to balance these weights between merciless betrayals and pleasant pleasures.
Scorpio Not accustomed to suffering, doesn’t know how. He tries his best, but it’s just not in him.
Sagittarius The complex martyr. With typical warmth of soul, Sagittarius collects a whole set of reasons to suffer and tries to time them so they all explode at once. For example, after the departure of a spouse (partner), Sagittarius is incapable of simply shedding tears, downing drink after drink. He’ll arrange it so that right after the other half leaves, he (not the ex-spouse/partner) gets fired from his job. Even better if he also breaks a leg.
Capricorn The brave martyr who looks straight ahead. He’s ready for any blow of fate because he knows that absolutely anything can happen in this life. And within him, there’s a flicker of hope that all this will soon end. And not just end—but end well, necessarily. Optimists… pink ones. Capricorn stubbornly butts his horns against the fence, chanting: “The pot isn’t eternal, isn’t eternal, fall down, damn it, Capricorn is a strong bird.” The fence can’t withstand it and collapses.
Aquarius The arrogant sufferers. Any little ant-people are unworthy of knowing about his pain. And from the outside, the scene unfolds like this: worried, insignificant, pitiful little people stand around, anticipating the moment to call an ambulance. But Aquarius couldn’t care less—his gaze, full of age-old suffering, is directed toward the constellation named after himself. “Just look at that!” mutters Aquarius. “They named a constellation after me—what about you, can you do that?” And then, relief comes over him.
Pisces They suffer and enjoy it. Perhaps it seems to them that suffering isn’t their thing. The purest water of self-deception. Give a typical Pisces the slightest pretext—even a phone call in the evening from an unknown Seraphim Ivanovich, who’s definitely a woman despite speaking in a deep baritone voice—and that’s enough. Oh! There’s the hook! They suffer… and how powerfully! You can hear and see it from a mile away. They bathe in tears and rush off to drown themselves. So what? Pisces don’t drown—why are you fussing over trifles?! The main thing isn’t to drown, but to make a statement.
